Saturday, May 29, 2010
Shhhhh you're disturbing the peas
I try to avoid the big supermarkets as much as I can. I just can't find anything to buy in them. My local one is so bad I might as well do my shopping at the service station where you can buy a warmed up again 'meat' pie or a pre(historic)packed sandwich. I like to go to the grocers where they have a choice of products not just their own brand and one other from Thailand, where the oranges are plentiful because they are in season and not from America where for some reason they are so bright you could use them as high viz traffic cones. However of late I have noticed a new kind of pest has permeated the food aisles, the mobile phone shopper. The I'm so popular I can't even buy sprouts without one of my five thousand hilARIOUS buddies calling me. They generally stand in front of the food item that you need to get to, staring at it with head cocked to the side and empty basket in arm, screaming into the freezer "you're fucking kidding me right". At the deli counter they leave bewildered assistants waiving leg ham in the air as the lesser ticket item holders suffer through a conversation about a four year old's teen model birthday party. I have nothing against mobile phones, I have two, one for work and one for personal use. In fact there is enough radiation coming out of my handbag to microwave a whole chicken. Perhaps if the supermarkets could provide a little outdoor area allocated specifically for mobile phone use to eliminate the risk of inhaling other people's crap conversations. Hmm. Might need to make that a bigger room.