Thursday, June 18, 2009

Check your details and try again

Could you live without it? I gave this some serious thought as I found myself in a blind rage at the telephone company's anti service system yet again. I get charged if I get a paper copy of the bill, I get charged if I pay online with a credit card, I get charged if the day ends in 'y'. To pay online it takes my computer three days to download their homepage because it contains so much advertising you might as well download the entire program from Cannes one by one. With telephones it seems to be about everything you didn't know you wanted and how they can charge you more for the privilege. I don't want a phone that I can watch tv on, I don't want my phone to give me directions, footy scores or weather reports. I particularly won't take relationship advice from it or ask it if I have met my perfect match. I want my phone to be a phone. Can I have a discount now please? I'm loathed to call them because I know it will end in tears with at least ten minutes of call routing hell and recordings of ... your call is important to us, then to be followed by press one if you are pissed off with our service or press two if you are so pissed off with us only a few rounds with a taser gun will calm you down or press three if you are already looking up the Moran family guide book of problem solving. It's all too hard so I'll just forward the amount into their account to feed the hungry beast again until next month.

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