Friday, November 27, 2009
I think the 'Melbourne in love with its trams' saying is a bit of a myth really and whilst there would probably have been a good argument to keep the horse and cart, someone made a good decision somewhere. I travel by tram a lot because my failed governments were too busy pulling each other's hair and calling each other names to put in a decent underground railway system and I don't find many people on board commenting about their affection for this rattling, bitumen destroying pile of tin. Trams belong to an era when we were just experimenting with steam trains and it didn't take very much for us to get all excited and give them names. Today's tram travel is an overcrowded bore and the wearing of i-pods is mandatory to drown out the noise of those women who persist in calling their equally bewildered friends whilst travelling on the tram and sharing the details of their weekend plans, colleagues worst attributes or previous night's vomit inducing binge. Shut the fuck up. If only my hardened glares would reach into their tiny brains.
A man in his 70's got on today and requested the 20 something to move her weary handbag from the seat so he could sit down. Can I slap her for that alone? He seems happy to be on his journey and was looking around and clearly wanting to join in a conversation with someone. He says to disinterested bag carer "she's warming up out there today...". He gets in return a grunt with not so much as eye contact from her. How rude. Are we so important that we can't provide some convivial comment on the weather? I took out my earphones as an offer of an alternative in case of the need for further discussion but he obviously thought better than to speak to the woman with the "shut the fuck up" look on her face. In some countries no one uses mobile phones on public transport because it would be ill mannered. If we kept the horse and carriage the traffic system would probably be the same with dedicated horse lanes, spray painted horses advertising the latest Grand Theft Auto game and MyHorse Card systems that don't work, and when the carriage pulled up at the lights you would hear "I was sooooo blind it was awesome". Clippity Clop. Ding ding whatever.
at 4:16 PM