Thursday, August 27, 2009

Pssst....come here

I am going to let you in on a secret. Technology is a con. I've just wasted 3 hours of my life trying to work out how to use my new mobile phone. This phone they promised, being an invisible 'they' of course, because I can't recall who 'they' are and I certainly don't have their address but I do recall someone somewhere saying these phones are great. They will upload a truck load they said, you can download a shitload they said and so I forked out a mother load and bought one. What a loud of bollocks I said. It can't manage to keep the time, my messages are still in Mandarin and the instruction manual is one page of how to turn it off and on in 17 different languages. I would have achieved more in my life if I had have spent those 3 hours looking out the window. Which was proving far too great a temptation to hurl the item over the balcony. Knowing that I'm not sufficiently high enough to cause the item splintering damage and being too late in the day to get to the West Gate Bridge, I will place the item back in its box and go retrieve my sanity. I have no idea if it will ring, beep, buzz or just laugh at me. Because I've been conned.

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